Thursday, April 2, 2009

My NDE

Note: This is a follow up to NDE-the backdrop and really, a depiction of what was happening around me..you could say in two different realms -(back to back) but manifested itself here in this particular event? Honestly, I hesitated to blog this on account of the references to hell - as I'm not into "hell & damnation"..(in the sense of bopping anyone over the head)- It is what it is though..so what the hell? Ha -Thanks
 
"There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven— A time to give birth and a time to die;...A time to weep and a time to laugh" Eccl 1:1-4

There I was with the devil On a high hill
Overlooking that grave
Late evening approaching
And I could feel the breeze blowing through my hair
Then I turned my head
But it was my future son
We were staring down upon his fathers tomb
Visions passed from nether worlds
Looking out aghast from a bank
On into an abyss of souls like a flood
Grasping at him..helpless
Lost in an orgy, bodies intertwined, gnashing
Beyond my reach
One thing I understood he- would not be there..
Nor would he be there to care for my boys
Then I found myself alone
I could hear a rushing sound
A mighty wind
Looking up towards the sky I saw reapers gathering
From the four corners of the earth
These angels swooped down
They'd come to separate the wheat from the chaff
Placing them in bundles
That's when I looked over
*
I recognized it was He- Jesus
Walking through these earthly fields
A towering figure dressed in white
His appearance oddly- a celestial void, reduced to the earthy Raw..but undeniably prophetic
Accompanied by a few
He looked out as they passed mortality
From the left to the right
He determined..
Yet I only saw brown fields
Every pore
 Soaked up words unspoken
Though I knew it all came down
To where He'd find us standing
 *
Then, it was as if I awoke
In the middle of a dessert
Uninhabited, deserted
Utterly alone -like some ancient Roman ruins
This empty backdrop
In tones of reddish brown-
Stark against an endless blue
Then sinking down through every fiber
Heavy like lead when the spirit's left the shell
Penetrating my being- the reality of life as I knew it-
Exactly what it felt like
An unmistakable void- Without the love God
***
Fast foreword- I conceived later that year to a healthy baby boy. Then approximately two years later, I gave birth to his brother. Their father, my husband passed away when he was just a mere 2 months old.

11 comments:

jeannette stgermain said...

Glad you got over your hesitation and posted this poem - I think it's very good!! Also, hell is a real place, and the reality of evil is the devil (my opinion). Sorry to hear that you had to raise your 2 boys alone. You have conquered some mountains, my friend:)

Regina Marie said...

Thanks Jeannette- really appreciate the feed back here! It was hard but thankfully it turned around for the good-
and glad you stopped by-

You know, for anyone reading this, I realize this may be a sensitive issue but I'd be curious as to what you think or if you happen to of had a similar experience?

The Write Girl said...

Hey Regina,

You convey such deep emotions and power in this poem...hard to convey in words. This is best piece of work I have read from you. I enjoyed all of your poems but this one has such palpable richness and depth. I am sorry about the experiences you have gone through. But you have shown you have so much to give and you give courage to other writers to express themselves more fully. Well done!!

Denise said...

This is a powerful poem and I am glad you shared it with us. I too am sorry you had to raise your two sons alone. I think this is a poem to read over, which I am going to do now. Thank you, I look forward to coming back.

Regina Marie said...

Write girl- I am so blessed by your words..and feel such a shared camaraderie here..wow, I'm so grateful-

Denise, I am glad this touched you and look forward to you coming back as well and feel likewise-

W/love-

Regina said...

God be with you. He will never leave you.
Continue writing poem,it's really moving..I'll be back soon.

By the way. Thanks for following me.

Regina Marie said...

Thanks to you Regina-

Pretty Me!! said...

Sorry to hear of your husband .. but coming to the poem .. i am glad i got to read this .. it has a real feeling to it .. the equation of devil anf God !! and isnt it the sane in all of our hearts !

Regina Marie said...

Hi there -thank you.
In the earthly sphere, the seeking part was not exemplified to me..although there was a knowledge of God demonstrated but limited to religion. I suppose why I consider it virgin territory- for myself anyway? Does that make sense?
Anyway, so glad you took the time to have a read-

Titania said...

Hi Regina Marie; I feel sad for you that you had to go through such deep sorrows.
I think it is a very big gift you have got to be able to put your deepest emotions into words which come from your deepest being. You are a great Poeta. Never hesitate to write what you feel.

Regina Marie said...

Many deep thanks..I'm grateful
Was just thinking of you and will be stopping by-

Let's be perfectly clear- the war on free speech is spiritual!